Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Should I change myself for them or not?

My brother is graduating high school in a few weeks so my family is coming here. Im dreading it! Since the last time they saw me they have treated me different. usually when im going to see them I change who I am so I fit there standards but last time I said screw it! And I walked around in my Enjoi shirts with my blond and sometimes red bangs. I didn't try covering my girly voice at all and spent 30 min on my face each night. I was stereo typical gay as I am at home. My home family just ignores it but my other family is too old fashioned for that. They acted like I was a freak. My grandpa gave me a long speech of how if he was like me when he was a kid he would have gotten the belt non-stop. That's his way of saying get new cloths and cut your hair! Im not going to be seen with this punk. . I got a lot of talks on how I seem gay and how that's not right from everyone. I was the freak of the entire town it seamed. I got weird looks and it was just in general not a good experience.



Usually I get out my T-shirts and cut my hair when Im around them but I look horrible like that! I usually change how I act too.Since spring break when I last saw them Ive dyed all around the bottom of my longish black hair blond. I always wear my Domo wrist band and a few bracelets. I wear nice cloths and my panda shirts. I act even more like a girl. Ect. So changing will be even harder.



So now Im debating on change or individuality. I Want them to continue liking me but I want to continue liking me too. Its hard to change who I am but if I don't Im a freak. IDK what to do here and need some advice. Im going to be going back with them and spending a lot of my summer in that screwy town and in Arkansas/Missouri with the rest of the family in small screwy towns. So whatever I choose its going to stay for a few months. So if you have any advise please share!Should I change myself for them or not?
Ya know it just depends if you care to make the effort to get along. I know it sucks, but these are people who may never accept you as gay. Geez, go ahead be the freak of the town and enjoy the attention. Have fun with it, you know.Should I change myself for them or not?
Hmmm..I'd have the talk with them. I'd do it when you arrive and just be serious. Do it once and do it right. Tell them how you feel and if they cannot handle it, you won't be visiting anymore.

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